Don't Pull This String!!!

" Hey, I will not do that ! Oh no, I won't! " Would you? The doctor's last words were: "DO NOT pull on this string!!" Oooohh...3 looong days with that damn string taped to my face! and Boy..did I want to.. I itched around it..and I snagged it..and I even ..in my drugged-induced slumber-tugged alittle on it.. but I din't! oh no.. I din'nt !! Mostly, cause I knew what... was attached to the end ot that string! You DO NOT want to know what was on the other end of that string ........do you? That's ok , I wouldn't tell you, anyway... way tooo gross. The nurse at the Dr's office really pulled on it today, and something awful, gross, and really terrible came out!! (even the nurse ran outta the room) ha!ha! It was too bad I had to stay in there and see it. Yuckoo! I'm sure glad you weren't there! I think I'm pretty tuff but I really.. wanted to pass out ...so.. you might have too! Now, close your eyes if you don't want to hear this ..but I had to lay back, put my feet up when my eyes watered.. (No I wasn't crying) and I saw this real.. ugly stuff come running out..but I know it was.... BLOOD! (boy..it stung alittle bit, Ooch!) I know..I know ...poor, poor me!

"Dr. Finally", (that's "Dr. Dugey Houser's" new name since it took him so long to get to this much, much, much needed sinus surgery.) Anyway, he widened the hole in my maxillary sinus by removing some bone. hurray! I will be able to breathe again! Air..finally. Yeahhh!! The old sinus cavity was so calcified and full of pus, which caused a few fleshy little polyps to grow over the sinus opening so then none of my cold virus ( & mucus) or the bacteria could escape, or thus heal, leaving me with a face full of dreaded infection! (Wheew! that was a mouthful or maybe just a cheekful ) your maxillary sinus is one of the larger cavities below your eyes..kinda in your cheeks.) ... and possibly with a (I hope -temporary) hearing loss in my ears! (Well, I've known I have been suffering for months now..since those damn locusts that ate at my trees this summer and fall .. if you don't know.. they are large green grass-hopper-like bugs that sing their "katy-did"mating songs sooo loudly that my kids thought I was just plain senile cause I couldn't hear them! ) Yes, for months now I have been deaf and dumb! I mean.. deaf and full of pain medicine! Too many sinus headaches and dizzy spells were inducing my "leave-me-alone-i-want-to-do-die-after-I-throw-up migraines", when what I really needed was to get this pot full of pus in my face sucked out! I know! again...yuk and poor, poor me! Do you feel sorry for me yet? In my Doc's defense, he wanted to do surgery before Xmas, but I.. bravely and stubbornly.. opted out. He put me on strong steroids to take some inflammation down and more antibiotics- now this is my 4th round of antibiotic. (Needless to say to those who have ever taken Prednisone, WoWeee, a person sure would get alot done on this stuff...if it wasn't for the bouncing off the walls and those little voices in your head!)

Anyway, Dr.Zamboni, preformed an inferior meatus androstromy endoscopic sinus surgery using a microdebrider! Whewww! there..did I say that right? It's where he widened the sinus opening by removing bone, cleaned out the gunk and removed the polyps (to be biopsied). The segury didn't take long and really was a breeze. Best part was the drugs they give you and BOY..they loaded me up! I don't much remember the ride home ...or the 2 mcDonalds burgers and french fries I woofed down, going on the computer to look for pictures of dogs that know how to smile!.... or even dancing the jig to show my grandchildren that I was alright ! Wohoo! was I high! Now tho, I still feel like I have the makings of a bad cold, with lots of unmentionable stuff slurping down the back of my throat, I got a headache, a toothache, a black-n-blue nose, and a sore throat, I'm still dizzy like I'm drunk so I keep falling over, I hear the sound of Xmas bells ringing, along witg my jaws are popping like pop corn, my watery eyes are a bit out of focus, and one side of my nose is definitly longer than the other! but then... I can't say I have had much pain! Good. huh? anyway I'm doing great. Looking forward to feeling better and really glad that little black string is gone from my face! I can't wait to find out if I'm gonna get any of my hearing back! Hurrah! for that.!! (those Katy-dids are goners next spring) Then if my nose doesn't shape up ..I'll try some plastic sergury on my eyes!